learning

As the time goes... I tend to learn more especially about human. About person, how human reacts. Why people lies, why people cheat, why people pretends. To be honest, I hate lies and pretending.

When people ask me on things, I will give a straight answer. Answer that is from me, an honest answer (without thinking about the person's feeling) and thinking that people can accept it - but I was wrong. As I learn about human, I cant do that anymore. Its not that I purposely want it but I just cant. The more you're trying to be yourself, the more you've been drag on other people shit. Its like a quicksand, more you struggle, the more you sink. I realise that human, likes to hear things that they want to hear, if not they dont want to accept it.

I hate to pretend that I like people, and I hate people who cant accept things I said whereas the person can say anything they want to me as if I don't have any feelings at all.

When this happens, I tend to judge people. And I really hate to judge people. This is where I start to choose, start to say things that the person only want to listen. I hate to choose, I hate to judge, I treat everyone I know equally. But I realise, that the world dont work that way. Human dont work that way.

Its truely a learning experience.

focus + multitasking

I don't know whether its true or not.. female are better at multitasking compared to male. For me its true. Yes I admit it that I'm bad in multitasking. I read that there's a gender differences in multitasking. Because there are already biological (females have larger corpus callosum and more white brain cells) and evolutionary explanations (men needed to be focused on hunting trips and war, while females had to engage in multitasking with kids and preparing food)

This last 14 days has been a hectic day for me. From family, burglary, studies, work, relationship and future all jumbled up in this 14 days. Too much for me I guess, yet I have to solve it even though I'm not very efficient in multitasking. I tend to lose focus on certain things, I tend to forgot on minor things, small things and other important thing that should be settled one at a time. It caused me mere panic attack. sigh...

acknowledge

I hate people who needs other people to acknowledge things that they did... nuff said.